The Abyss

Jan Van Eyck - The Last Judgement, 1425-1430.

There is, within the soul of each of us, an abyss - a gulf of pain and darkness - which must be overcome if the soul is to reach its fullness. The life of one who is rather uncomplicated might only consist of material concerns, trivialities and vanities. This is the life of those who, for one reason or another – perhaps ignorance, perhaps distraction, perhaps sheer weakness – never approach the abyss until death slides them into it, silencing them forever. While they live though, it remains to them a distant, unseen enigma. Despite feeling the pull of its dark gravity through their emptiness, they never truly perceive it as the vital obstacle to overcome that it is. They react to its distant tugging by pouring foolish scorn upon all those who appear to move outside their own empty realms of comfort.

Some people – most, I would say – sense the abyss as a black depth within their lives that calls to them, though they are only confused and disheartened by that call. In such people, who are still largely distracted from their souls’ yearning through the strength of their ties to the world, a perceivable sense of wrongness may, seemingly from nowhere, occasionally leap into the fronts of their minds. They may become depressed, restless and anxious, or they may feel that their lives have not taken the directions that they would have wished them to and may feel a great impulse to change the direction of their lives. They feel the need to cross the abyss, though they are still unaware about the details of its nature and existence. In response to its distant pull they might make some necessary changes in their lives as they point their faces towards it and from doing so might feel some sense of relief before turning back to their worldly distractions; but their dreams, on being touched, remain distantly haunted.

Then there are some who come to see the abyss in its full, horrific blackness. These are people who see their lives as a journey of the soul, in which they must pass from one state of awareness and development to another: and as they turnthe bleak bends of life’s roads, they feel, through the darkening pallour of the skies and the silence that pervades their senses, that some great and awful obstacle lies ahead. Few other footsteps are heard on this road, and its reward – reaching the sharp ledges of the abyss – is a terrible one.

Those who arrive at the abyss must first, by compulsion, look down into it. Its effects are hypnotic and frightening; but much is learned about the nature of the soul when its darkness is examined. Indeed, one cannot reach the parts of the road that are bathed in light – those parts which lie over the other side of the abyss – unless one has first overcome this great darkness. At this stage, many are filled with arrogance, believing the ability to reach the abyss is equitable with the ability to pass over it. This is not so. It is, in fact, the case that no man can cross the abyss without a divine hand to guide him. Some will deny that this is so, and, if they never repent of this denial, their souls fall into darkness forever.

On looking into the abyss, some choose to be cautious and rather than take a brave leap of madness, swing their legs over its ledge and descend, inch by inch, into its dank pitch. The climb downwards is long and lonely and terrible to abide; and the deeper down into the hole they climb the further away the light, visible only when they look up, becomes. As that light fades to a pin-prick some awaken to their folly and realise, on seeing the light of God, their soul and their humanity getting further and further away from them, the hopeless, empty nature of the bleak place that they are descending into. At this point, some find the courage in their hearts to turn back and repent of their foolish, wayward, prideful descent – which they perceive will only lead them to eternal darkness – and begin the arduous climb back up the high banks of the abyss.

When at the top, they find themselves glad to be back on the road from where they came. And they also find that the journey to the abyss was not in vain; for, having emptied themselves of their delusions and vanities, they find that there is now a bridge over the abyss in the shape of a cross. And so they walk over that holy bridge and reach the illuminated road that lies spiralling upwards, beyond the dark pit of Abaddon. Should they look back now, as they ascend the mountain that lies beyond the dreary plains below them, they might see, from their elevated position, others who have now arrived at the abyss. Some start the same slow, painful descent down its jagged, bloody rocks, unable to hear the moans of despair that arise from its bottomless depths. Others try to leap over it and they think, upon landing on the other side, that they have done so through their own strength and merit: but they have not seen the divine hand that has assisted them in their leaping and they do not perceive that they could not bear to face, yet alone pass over, that great darkness without its unseen, reassuring touch. For their blindness and obstinacy they are placed back at the ledge of the abyss, doomed to leap again and again until, at death, when all becomes lost, they plunge downwards and are lost forever.

My soul is full of trouble
and my life draws near the grave.
I am counted among those who go down to the pit;
I am like a man without strength.
I am set apart with the dead,
like the slain who lie in the grave,
whom you remember no more,
who are cut off from your care.

Psalm 88.